Explosives Design Engineer
Boston
Posted 5 months ago
Company: ACME Corporation
Division: Experimental Products & Unintended Consequences
Role: Explosives Design Engineer
Responsibilities:
- Design, prototype, and deploy explosive devices intended to capture a single, unusually fast desert bird
- Conduct live-field testing with minimal supervision and maximal optimism
- Rapidly iterate after catastrophic failure
- Document malfunctions (optional; survivors preferred)
- Collaborate with gravity, timing errors, and irony
Requirements:
- PhD optional (street smarts acceptable)
- Tolerance for frequent malfunctions mandatory
- Ability to recover from anvils, rockets, and cliff-related incidents
- OSHA awareness discouraged
- Must sign liability waiver (multiple pages)
Benefits:
- Unlimited prototypes
- Immediate feedback loop
- Free anvils
- Strong job security (position never successfully completed)